Important Note: This RP will, for the most part, be less than serious. I honestly can't look at any of this with a straight face.
Tired of your boring everyday life? Want to see some action? Want to go see the rest of the universe without the help of some weirdo with two hearts, or perhaps even see some other ones?
Now, you can! Join me, the Gunstar Mercenary himself, as I combat the absolute evilest of villains, and the sleaziest of scumbags! Or perhaps you want something different? Perhaps you want to see the so-called "good guys" get their comeuppance (I'm looking at you, elf-boy, you damn vandal.)? You can!
You will, of course, be paid handsomely for your efforts. A cut of any and all payments provided by our clients. We are a mercenary guild, after all.
Interested? Simply fill out a form an application with the required information below and send it to me. Via any means you can think of. Trust me, if it's meant to be sent to me, it'll find it's way no matter what.
If you are accepted, I will come by to pick you up. Keep an eye out for my ship, the Osprey. You can't possibly miss it.
By the way, don't try to show this poster to anyone else. Chances are, they'll see it as a plain piece of paper. Seriously, save yourself the trouble.
Now, here is the application you will be filling out. This is merely an example.
Basic Appearance: You could either describe yourself in FIFTEEN BORING PARAGRAPHS for me to read, or simply attach a photo. Whichever is easier. Oh, and here's a photo of my ugly mug.
Gender: Obvious. I'm a guy, by the way. (Note: If by some technicality you don't HAVE a gender, Leave blank.)
Name: Really, who doesn't have one? For example, MY name is Argonz Tristam, the Gunstar Mercenary.
Universe/world/galaxy: This is important. Like, REAL important. Obviously, I need to know where you are to find you.
Are you from a world where magic is common, and the technology is crap? Or are you in a world where monsters are trapped in little balls?
Me? I'm from a universe where humans don't exist, and where animals take their place. Doesn't have a name, but I call it Furrae. I tend to go there never, though.
[Note: If you don't have a name to call your world, don't be afraid to call it something else. For example... "World of Warcraft", or "Fire Emblem". Whatever works.]
Race: Also simple. Are you human? Because I'm not. I'm a Felin, a cat-person. Just put an E in my race's name and it all makes sense.
Race Perks: What do you get out of being what you are, if anything? My race, for example, is famous for their speed, flexibility, reflexes, and overall agility.
Equipment/items: Your belongings. Anything you have that you consider useful, or simply wish to keep for personal reasons, write it down here. Everything else will have to be left behind.
I, personally, have this suit of bad-ass armor! Nicked it off some guy calling himself a bounty hunter. Bonus points if you can tell me what universe it's from. [Just leave a note or something, and I'll give you a cookie.]
Oh, and also these two blaster pistols, complete with adjustable power levels, from non-lethal to explosive. Guess which setting I use most.
I also have this awesome rocket board, too, which is more than capable of flight. Stole that too. Never giving it back, either.
Personality: Yes, this is important. If you can't figure out what your personality is like. Ask a friend. You can leave this blank, if you want, but don't expect me to give you cookies for it. I don't like emotionless androids.
As for me, I'm wild and crazy, taking risks like nobody's business and constantly performing near-suicidal stunts for the thrill of it. You only live once, and to hell with the acronym! Downside is, I get bored too easily, and I admit that I get distracted a bit too easily.
Ability: Everyone's special, and then some of those special people are blessed with weird powers. What's yours, if you have any?
For those curious, time has a funny tendency to slow down to a crawl for me.
Skills: Why should I hire you? What are you good at? Me, I'm a perfectly good sharpshooter, great with guns, though I'm perfectly fine with sticking knives in people.
Also. Good at making things go boom. Good at flying ships, blowing [censored] up, stealth, assassination, and blowing stuff up.
Did I mention good at blowing [censored] up?
History: If you absolutely MUST tell me your life story, go ahead. Don't expect me to read through the whole thing, especially if it's a miniature novel. [Kind of like this poster!]
I'll be happy with you just telling me the good bits, but you can leave this blank if you prefer. As for me... Meh, you'll find out later.
Theme: Almost done. Now write down your favorite song. You don't have to, but I like having things to listen to. Like this song, for instance! I could listen to that all day.
Rules: These, you have to pay attention to, not following these may force me to shoot you. Trust me, we'll have an easier time if you pay attention to these.
1. As per usual affair with basically any mercenary group. You can not be leagues stronger than me, the leader. Sure, you might be able to do things I can't, but you can never, EVER be better. Seriously, If I see you put down a titan-class battleship with nothing more than your bare hands without a REALLY good explanation, I'll shoot you point-blank in the head. I can't be too careful, these days. You could end up betraying me, and I don't like the risk of strong people betraying me.
2. No betraying me, obviously. And no betraying anyone else who is a Gunstar Mercenary.
3. You can have relationships. But if it interferes too much with our/my work, I'll drop you both onto a god-forsaken ice ball of a planet.
4. This rule applies to everyone, even me. You're not to interact too extensively with any civilization who has not managed to perfect space travel. It is called the Underdeveloped Planet Preservation Pact, UP3 for short.
In short, it means don't wave your blasters around or wear power armor when the technology level on the planet amounts to "hit people with big sticks".
Now, get to writing those applications, because this is a limited time offer! I'll even throw in a free blaster pistol for new recruits!
Tired of your boring everyday life? Want to see some action? Want to go see the rest of the universe without the help of some weirdo with two hearts, or perhaps even see some other ones?
Now, you can! Join me, the Gunstar Mercenary himself, as I combat the absolute evilest of villains, and the sleaziest of scumbags! Or perhaps you want something different? Perhaps you want to see the so-called "good guys" get their comeuppance (I'm looking at you, elf-boy, you damn vandal.)? You can!
You will, of course, be paid handsomely for your efforts. A cut of any and all payments provided by our clients. We are a mercenary guild, after all.
Interested? Simply fill out a form an application with the required information below and send it to me. Via any means you can think of. Trust me, if it's meant to be sent to me, it'll find it's way no matter what.
If you are accepted, I will come by to pick you up. Keep an eye out for my ship, the Osprey. You can't possibly miss it.
By the way, don't try to show this poster to anyone else. Chances are, they'll see it as a plain piece of paper. Seriously, save yourself the trouble.
Now, here is the application you will be filling out. This is merely an example.
Basic Appearance: You could either describe yourself in FIFTEEN BORING PARAGRAPHS for me to read, or simply attach a photo. Whichever is easier. Oh, and here's a photo of my ugly mug.
Gender: Obvious. I'm a guy, by the way. (Note: If by some technicality you don't HAVE a gender, Leave blank.)
Name: Really, who doesn't have one? For example, MY name is Argonz Tristam, the Gunstar Mercenary.
Universe/world/galaxy: This is important. Like, REAL important. Obviously, I need to know where you are to find you.
Are you from a world where magic is common, and the technology is crap? Or are you in a world where monsters are trapped in little balls?
Me? I'm from a universe where humans don't exist, and where animals take their place. Doesn't have a name, but I call it Furrae. I tend to go there never, though.
[Note: If you don't have a name to call your world, don't be afraid to call it something else. For example... "World of Warcraft", or "Fire Emblem". Whatever works.]
Race: Also simple. Are you human? Because I'm not. I'm a Felin, a cat-person. Just put an E in my race's name and it all makes sense.
Race Perks: What do you get out of being what you are, if anything? My race, for example, is famous for their speed, flexibility, reflexes, and overall agility.
Equipment/items: Your belongings. Anything you have that you consider useful, or simply wish to keep for personal reasons, write it down here. Everything else will have to be left behind.
I, personally, have this suit of bad-ass armor! Nicked it off some guy calling himself a bounty hunter. Bonus points if you can tell me what universe it's from. [Just leave a note or something, and I'll give you a cookie.]
Oh, and also these two blaster pistols, complete with adjustable power levels, from non-lethal to explosive. Guess which setting I use most.
I also have this awesome rocket board, too, which is more than capable of flight. Stole that too. Never giving it back, either.
Personality: Yes, this is important. If you can't figure out what your personality is like. Ask a friend. You can leave this blank, if you want, but don't expect me to give you cookies for it. I don't like emotionless androids.
As for me, I'm wild and crazy, taking risks like nobody's business and constantly performing near-suicidal stunts for the thrill of it. You only live once, and to hell with the acronym! Downside is, I get bored too easily, and I admit that I get distracted a bit too easily.
Ability: Everyone's special, and then some of those special people are blessed with weird powers. What's yours, if you have any?
For those curious, time has a funny tendency to slow down to a crawl for me.
Skills: Why should I hire you? What are you good at? Me, I'm a perfectly good sharpshooter, great with guns, though I'm perfectly fine with sticking knives in people.
Also. Good at making things go boom. Good at flying ships, blowing [censored] up, stealth, assassination, and blowing stuff up.
Did I mention good at blowing [censored] up?
History: If you absolutely MUST tell me your life story, go ahead. Don't expect me to read through the whole thing, especially if it's a miniature novel. [Kind of like this poster!]
I'll be happy with you just telling me the good bits, but you can leave this blank if you prefer. As for me... Meh, you'll find out later.
Theme: Almost done. Now write down your favorite song. You don't have to, but I like having things to listen to. Like this song, for instance! I could listen to that all day.
Rules: These, you have to pay attention to, not following these may force me to shoot you. Trust me, we'll have an easier time if you pay attention to these.
1. As per usual affair with basically any mercenary group. You can not be leagues stronger than me, the leader. Sure, you might be able to do things I can't, but you can never, EVER be better. Seriously, If I see you put down a titan-class battleship with nothing more than your bare hands without a REALLY good explanation, I'll shoot you point-blank in the head. I can't be too careful, these days. You could end up betraying me, and I don't like the risk of strong people betraying me.
2. No betraying me, obviously. And no betraying anyone else who is a Gunstar Mercenary.
3. You can have relationships. But if it interferes too much with our/my work, I'll drop you both onto a god-forsaken ice ball of a planet.
4. This rule applies to everyone, even me. You're not to interact too extensively with any civilization who has not managed to perfect space travel. It is called the Underdeveloped Planet Preservation Pact, UP3 for short.
In short, it means don't wave your blasters around or wear power armor when the technology level on the planet amounts to "hit people with big sticks".
Now, get to writing those applications, because this is a limited time offer! I'll even throw in a free blaster pistol for new recruits!
You know, most people call me insane...
That's what happens when I try to reason with people, they don't like it, and I eventually end up turning them to charcoal in the end...
Why are you looking at me like that?
Despite popular belief, I did not draw the avatar I'm using. I can't draw.
