I want that cookie >:3!!

Bitch slap, then walk away with the cookie.

Trade a Christmas tree for the cookie.

*eats Christmas tree, steals jm9922's soul, and takes cookie*
Pic related, it's the cookie.

Uses a fire attack to kill shedinja.

Takes cookie.

kidnaps and sells NZ Stephano to the barrels as a hostage.

Takes cookie before selling him.

Tranquilizes Stryder.
Steals cookie after he sleeps.

Steals cookie from Ryuzaki
Shot him with gun

uses teleportation powers, teleports behind PewdsFan888, distracts him, steals his cookie without him knowing and teleports away

Tonikiller teleported into my washroom as I was peeing. He screams at the sight of my genitals and drops the cookie into the toilet.
I picked up the cookie, wipe off the pee, and hide in my tub.

Now nobody wants the cookie anymore. Therefore, Beeckusu gets to keep it.

To keep this game going, I attempt to master the forbidden art of cooking to make another cookie. I succeed.

I HAVE A NEW COOKIE.
I hide in a giant hamster ball to keep others from stealing it from me.

teleports in the giant hamster ball, farts, then stryder221 chokes to death, *takes cookie, opens hamster ball & walks away*

*Revives, because that's a stupid way to die, stabs Tonikiller in the back, rips off various limbs, then starts to [TOO GORY TO TYPE]. What's left is a bloody mess. Takes the mysteriously unbloodied cookie, affords one more kick to the body, and burns it before leaving.*

"That'll teach ya to teleport, I'll have none of that."

*Wanders off with the precious. [cookie]*

Jumps from the tree he was watching you in and scares the shit out of you,kicks you and runs with cookie.
(Why can't we just eat it?)

Uses teleportation powers to spawn again (Too overpowered xD), makes a High exploding tripwire trap, then Zara steps on it causing the tripwire to explode and leave only bone dust. takes the (invincible) cookie, makes a treehouse with various tripwire traps and hides himself and the cookie in it

Uses my claw to cut down the tree house, and kill Tomkiller, pick up the cookie, and run as fast as I can.

Yukari runs directly into me, I place a flaming palm into her(?) face. While she screams in pain I steal the cookie and run off.

Later, at home I put up some anti-teleportation wards, so anyone teleporting inside my house will be instantly turned into a fine red mist.

Right but since you didnt close the windows (oh silly you) i fly in your house steal the cookie and fly away!

I use Shadow Sneak to surprise Mr. Birds, and steal the cookie whilst he panics.