Tough Question

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    • Tough Question

      Hey bros, Whatcha think about this, is it better to wait for your crush or move on? There are times when waiting does good and times when you are just wasting you time. How long should you wait before you need to let the crush go? :huh:
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    • RebelNinja89 wrote:

      Well do you guys get along?
      I'm not sure...how long have you been waiting?
      Well lets say the "hypothetical scenario" included the crush as a best friend and the crush has knowledge of said crush but doesnt want to deal with it. And the wait time has been a year.... a long year... in this "hypothetical scenario" of course :whistling:
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    • I feel like setting a time standard on such a topic isn't really practical.

      Each situation is different and has it's own circumstances. I feel as though there are a ton of details that would need to be known in order for us to give good advice. That being said, sharing tons of details may leave someone uncomfortable as well.

      Either way, here comes some generic advice....
      "Trust your feelings!" Moving on shouldn't be a "it's been this long, time to move on" type of thing, in my opinion. People move on without realizing it, not just saying one day "Mk, it's been # of days, i'm over it". This hypothetical person will move on, probably when they find something that better occupies their attention. It's a gradual process.

    • Personally I think It's safe to say that the person you've set eyes on, likely wouldn't be the person you settle down with however many years down the line, and Since you're only 19 your not short on time to get over them and meet someone else. Plus anyway, If there's even a DOUBT or TINY thought whether to move on or not, then move on. If you really "LOVED" her or if she was "THE ONE" (pff!) then you wouldn't even be asking us, right?

      Lecture over. SOWWY!!! XD

    • It's been a year and nothing has happened. Since this person is your best friend, there's a chance it might not happen but there's a chance that it will. I think the situation depends on how you feel. Are the feelings in so deep that you haven't had feelings for anyone else? Or are they so light that there's a chance you'll like someone else when the opportunity comes by? It might be time to move on but don't think that there isn't a chance.
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    • Well, it's up to you i guess. Try to ask her for a walk, befriend her. But, i suggest that you ask her as as soon as possible. Just gather the courage and wait for the perfect time. Don't worry son, this world ain't gonna end soon.

      Protip: Don't tell ANYONE about your feelings. Except if you really trust him/her. Personal experience here, 3 years relationship ruined because of this.

      If you're angry, don't break anybody's heart, they only have one..... Break their bones, they have 206 of them

    • I've witnesses a scenario like this while I was in highschool.

      I had a really good friend (lets call him R) and he has this huge crush on my close friend (lets call her L). It started when we were in our freshman year, and L was aware of R's feelings, because he wasn't really that good in hiding his emotions. So what R did to win L's heart is to always do these stuff to make her "happy". He did all her homeworks, some of her projects, always accompanied her home and the like. L initially didn't want him to do things like those but she began to abuse him because she knew R would do anything she wants, and he just began to not care for his own being.

      This shit went on for years. Until we were in our second year of college. I felt bad for him because of the maltreatment and ask him "Do you want to still do this and wait for her?" He finally said no. And now he's happy as he is. My point is, if you're just going to waste time on this one particular person, you're going to miss out on most things.

      I just hope I said something helpful idk. Just want to help a bro out. Heh heh.
      And sorry it's longer than I expected.
      "Happiness exists when you don't know a thing." - The Weeknd

    • Yvcc wrote:

      I've witnesses a scenario like this while I was in highschool.

      I had a really good friend (lets call him R) and he has this huge crush on my close friend (lets call her L). It started when we were in our freshman year, and L was aware of R's feelings, because he wasn't really that good in hiding his emotions. So what R did to win L's heart is to always do these stuff to make her "happy". He did all her homeworks, some of her projects, always accompanied her home and the like. L initially didn't want him to do things like those but she began to abuse him because she knew R would do anything she wants, and he just began to not care for his own being.

      This shit went on for years. Until we were in our second year of college. I felt bad for him because of the maltreatment and ask him "Do you want to still do this and wait for her?" He finally said no. And now he's happy as he is. My point is, if you're just going to waste time on this one particular person, you're going to miss out on most things.

      I just hope I said something helpful idk. Just want to help a bro out. Heh heh.
      And sorry it's longer than I expected.
      I'm pretty sure we call it "The Friendzone".. or probably "Abusive Friendzone"... or even "Slavezone"

      If you're angry, don't break anybody's heart, they only have one..... Break their bones, they have 206 of them

    • SwingPoynt wrote:

      "Trust your feelings!" Moving on shouldn't be a "it's been this long, time to move on" type of thing, in my opinion. People move on without realizing it, not just saying one day "Mk, it's been # of days, i'm over it". This hypothetical person will move on, probably when they find something that better occupies their attention. It's a gradual process.
      I agree with this. It's not wise to move on by simply having no response for almost a year. Heck, I know that mistake because I did it. I had a friend before, we were friends for like... 3 and a half years? We spent a good deal of time and whenever I get a chance to be alone with her I would make sure I can talk to her. Fact is, after those 3 or so years, I was told by my ex (we were only friends back then) that she liked me... Yeah, I thought 3 years she didn't like me, and I was feeling some really deep sh*t because I went out with someone else during those 3 years. Guilt overwhelmed me. When the time came to admit to her how I felt, it was too late... Don't get yourself in the scenario where it is too late by saying it's time to move on because it's been a certain time (it's only a year anyway, trust me, it's not that long). Give yourself the guts to admit the truth and talk about it.


      I have this saying to myself all the time:
      "Time is an Illusion. It is perfect, yet it is flawed It will run fast, yet it will slow down. It will tell you the truth, yet it will lie. It will be your ally, yet it will be your enemy."


      I made this whole saying up. I use it to say to myself ever since I met my ex when we were just good friends trying to help each other get to our crush (ToraDora moment if you've ever watched that anime). This saying pretty much says time will be one or the other. Take that year with no response and see if its a good thing or a bad thing, but be prepared for both outcomes, so the impact won't hurt as much ^_^

      "When life gives you bullets... ME! CORMANO!"
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    • Dandy Dragon wrote:

      Yvcc wrote:

      I've witnesses a scenario like this while I was in highschool.

      I had a really good friend (lets call him R) and he has this huge crush on my close friend (lets call her L). It started when we were in our freshman year, and L was aware of R's feelings, because he wasn't really that good in hiding his emotions. So what R did to win L's heart is to always do these stuff to make her "happy". He did all her homeworks, some of her projects, always accompanied her home and the like. L initially didn't want him to do things like those but she began to abuse him because she knew R would do anything she wants, and he just began to not care for his own being.

      This shit went on for years. Until we were in our second year of college. I felt bad for him because of the maltreatment and ask him "Do you want to still do this and wait for her?" He finally said no. And now he's happy as he is. My point is, if you're just going to waste time on this one particular person, you're going to miss out on most things.

      I just hope I said something helpful idk. Just want to help a bro out. Heh heh.
      And sorry it's longer than I expected.
      I'm pretty sure we call it "The Friendzone".. or probably "Abusive Friendzone"... or even "Slavezone"
      Well he was really patient. I'd give him that.
      "Happiness exists when you don't know a thing." - The Weeknd

    • Yvcc wrote:

      Dandy Dragon wrote:

      Yvcc wrote:

      I've witnesses a scenario like this while I was in highschool.

      I had a really good friend (lets call him R) and he has this huge crush on my close friend (lets call her L). It started when we were in our freshman year, and L was aware of R's feelings, because he wasn't really that good in hiding his emotions. So what R did to win L's heart is to always do these stuff to make her "happy". He did all her homeworks, some of her projects, always accompanied her home and the like. L initially didn't want him to do things like those but she began to abuse him because she knew R would do anything she wants, and he just began to not care for his own being.

      This shit went on for years. Until we were in our second year of college. I felt bad for him because of the maltreatment and ask him "Do you want to still do this and wait for her?" He finally said no. And now he's happy as he is. My point is, if you're just going to waste time on this one particular person, you're going to miss out on most things.

      I just hope I said something helpful idk. Just want to help a bro out. Heh heh.
      And sorry it's longer than I expected.
      I'm pretty sure we call it "The Friendzone".. or probably "Abusive Friendzone"... or even "Slavezone"
      Well he was really patient. I'd give him that.
      I will now stamp this with quote "Used and Abused" with said quote backed up by the reason "Blinded by love"

      "When life gives you bullets... ME! CORMANO!"
      Visit meh on deviantART and see all my horrible art stuff
      ChronoPinoyX deviantART

    • If you are having thoughts of "moving on" then it seems this is more than a crush. Crushes aren't something that causes you to think like that. Crushes are usually just "oh I like this person for this reason." Crushes also don't usually last more than a few months. I think you really like this person, and just because she knows and isn't acting upon it yet doesn't mean she doesn't like you. It's quite possible that she is taking things slow and seeing if you really are going to be that type of person that "every girl wants."

      Also, what do you mean by "doesn't want to deal with it"? The way you say it there it's as if she feels that your feelings for her are a problem, and if that is the case, then yes, it's definitely time to find someone new. The most important thing when it comes to love is never, ever, try to "make it happen". If she feels for you, then those feelings will come naturally without you having to do anything except be yourself.

    • CORMANO wrote:

      Yvcc wrote:

      Dandy Dragon wrote:

      Yvcc wrote:

      I've witnesses a scenario like this while I was in highschool.

      I had a really good friend (lets call him R) and he has this huge crush on my close friend (lets call her L). It started when we were in our freshman year, and L was aware of R's feelings, because he wasn't really that good in hiding his emotions. So what R did to win L's heart is to always do these stuff to make her "happy". He did all her homeworks, some of her projects, always accompanied her home and the like. L initially didn't want him to do things like those but she began to abuse him because she knew R would do anything she wants, and he just began to not care for his own being.

      This shit went on for years. Until we were in our second year of college. I felt bad for him because of the maltreatment and ask him "Do you want to still do this and wait for her?" He finally said no. And now he's happy as he is. My point is, if you're just going to waste time on this one particular person, you're going to miss out on most things.

      I just hope I said something helpful idk. Just want to help a bro out. Heh heh.
      And sorry it's longer than I expected.
      I'm pretty sure we call it "The Friendzone".. or probably "Abusive Friendzone"... or even "Slavezone"
      Well he was really patient. I'd give him that.
      I will now stamp this with quote "Used and Abused" with said quote backed up by the reason "Blinded by love"
      Well we were young then. You know how it is with us, we think it's "true love". We believe everything at this point in our lives.
      But oh well.
      "Happiness exists when you don't know a thing." - The Weeknd