A part of the real story.

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    • Lucifer wrote:

      what i'm trying to tell you? no one cares about your problem, they will even screw you more, because no one really know you well, you know only yourself, so solve problems for yourself, and screw others.


      No one? Yeah, right ;P
      And by the way, didn't write this to get help from you guys. I wrote this to let people know.
      I have not failed. I have just found 10 000 ways that do not work.

    • LordVoldemort wrote:

      I'm gonna tell you a part of the real story about why I'm mad at my father.

      I have a depression. He doesn't understand that even though I've told him. I'm eating medicine and stuff for it and so on.
      He is one of the reasons for my depression. Of course I have not told him that. I'm so scared of him. I don't want to be alone with him because I'm afraid that he will rage and eventually hit me. That has happened before. Do you know how it's like to be afraid of your own father?

      I hate my class in school and sometimes I just cant go.
      I have one friend in real life and she lives far away from me. She is my best friend and the only one whom I trust till 100%.
      Because of the lack of friends I am very lonely and therefore the computer is one of the most important things for me, besides my niece and nephew. I never go out unless it's for school or my parents make me.
      If I had a dog I would get company and exercise so I have a reason for wanting a dog. It seems to me that my father does not want me to get better.

      I'm not spoiled or anything like that, I just want to get better.
      I don't wanna be this depressed, sensitive person that I am.

      Oh well. It's not like anybody really cares about my story but I just wanted to tell you a part of my life.

      My father is in denial as well. I don't exactly have depression but without my friends or family around to encourage me or anything, I find it hard to get my strength and motivation up alone. What I have been doing recently is going to Group Therapy in college. I've gone at gotten consoling by their therapists and it has helped me for the most part. My family doesn't talk about mental problems like bipolar disorder or depression because those are issues the person must confront on their own. They also don't consider hereditary to be much of a problem...except when diabetes and high blood pressure are involved. But anyway, I'm getting off topic. There are ways to get pass that wall, I know because I've crossed it a few times. Try to seek consoling and even opt for group therapy, just having other people listen to what's going on in your life and being able to provide insight to their problems as well can help a lot.